Reed hit his 2 week mark today. With that come many questions I have concerning the whole parenting thing:
1. When is it too early to introduce formula? I am exclusively breastfeeding at the moment, but I also pump and Kevin gives him one bottle a day. This was another issue...lots of people said not to give him a bottle because he'll get confused. Yeah whatever. I hear formula-fed babies sleep longer. What are your thoughts on giving formula at night only? I can only last so long on an hour of sleep a night. So not formula all day, but maybe at night? Will he get "confused?"
2. What do you do if your baby has their days and nights confused? Reed is so fussy and restless at night; of course he sleeps peacefully during the day. I wake him up every 2-3 hours during the day to eat, but that hasn't made a difference. Any suggestions? We're going to put him in his own room tonight and see if that helps at all.
3. I think Reed is binky-dependent. Grrr. I wanted to avoid this at all costs. But what do you do when he wants to self-soothe but hasn't found his hands yet? And I don't want to feed him every hour. I'm not a human pacifier.
4. We tried out a baby sling the other day. Not a fan. Reed looked ridiculously uncomfortable and not secure. Are we doing it wrong? You'd think we know considering that Kevin sells them.
5. I feel more limited now than I did during pregnancy with the foods I have to avoid. Gosh, I want chocolate so bad! Stop giving me candy, people. It just sits in my cupboard and mocks me.
6. When should we bring Reedster to church?
7. Is there some sort of trick to breastfeeding in public? First of all, there is no way I could ever do it one-handed (boobs too big). I basically have to undress myself to feed him at all. I don't understand how the whole nursing bra, undergarments, thing works. I have a "hooter hider" but still I can't do it one-handed or discreetly. I need to master this if I want to ever leave my apartment. I have had to schedule everything around Reed eating.
8. Do your boobs ever stop leaking?
I am open for any suggestions whatsoever. I have no idea what I am doing. Especially with the whole night thing. Our pediatrician said it's pretty much impossible to introduce a routine until 6 weeks. But why do all those books say otherwise? I don't know if I can last another 4 weeks before dying. Give your input PLEASE!
7 comments:
Ok, I know you don't know me, but Kevin and I were friends in high school...
Check out the book "The Baby Whisperer" by Tracy Hogg. It changed my life as a mother. Routines CAN be established early, but maybe not "two weeks old" early. Your cute baby WILL sleep through the night, or even just give you longer stretches really soon. Just hang in there!
Nursing in public is kind of joke. Lots of places have rooms for you so you're not sitting on a bench next to the food court. If there's no family restroom with a chair, you can sit in a stall. I've done that before. Or you can always go to your car. The mechanics of it all does get easier.
Hang in there! Sleep when the baby does! Everyone says it, but it's the best advice I can give. Kevin can do the dishes and clean the house, but he can't sleep for you.
Good luck!
Rhinnon,
Reading your list of cencerns has taken me back to about 5 years and 3 months ago! I really don't have all the answers (somehow I survived the first several months of baby #1) but I can let you know what has worked for me. However, you have posed too many questions for me to even begin addressing in such a small space. Can I call you? If so, when is a good time. If you want, you can call me and I'll call you back. Take care!
I never nursed in public. I was soooo paranoid about it and was a little weirded out by the mother's lounge in the church, even. I brought a bottle everywhere I went and if he was still hungry when it was gone, then, too bad. sounds harsh, but they can handle it.
I think the binky is fine. Eventually you'll wanna try to only give it to him when he's going to sleep to help him sooth himself. But, for now, everything I've read says it's great for a baby to have a binky.. it keeps him quiet :)
For Liam, he learned the difference between night and day pretty quickly because we kept it dark and quiet at night-ALWAYS. And during the day there were normal noises and lots of light. He learned that night was dark and boring and day was bright and stimulating. You could even try using a fan or something for white noise when it's time to sleep so he learns that when he hears that noise, it's time to sleep. Also, try to develop a bedtime routine when he's, like, 6 weeks old. This works WONDERS!!
Don't bring the baby to church until he's AT LEAST 6 weeks old. I didn't go 'till Liam was 2 months old, but that's mostly because I was so tired and would sleep any chance I got.
And finally, Breast milk is best but formula is also good for your baby. You could do half formula, half milk at night or formula only at night or whatever variation makes you most sane. Don't feel bad about what you decide to do. It's your baby and you. Not anyone else's. And your boobs will stop leaking, I promise! I had the same problem. And then I had an over-supply of milk, which made them get engorged and leak and all kinds of crazy things. Grrr. But your body will figure itself out.
You're doing great, don't worry! And remember that it's hard to establish a routine or anything before 6 weeks, and that 4-6 weeks is usually the worst. Once you get passed that, you'll be golden :)
Breastfeeding- my first two boys did not breastfeed. Ty has the best immunue system I've ever seen. My third was the only one I breastfed and that was for 4 months because I had breast infection after breast infection and finally said, Screw this. So I think whatever you choose to do will be fine. Just switch off if you need/want to. Colby(third), I bottled fed in the hospital and at home for four day until my milk came in and when my milk came in it was so painful I decided to let him get the milk out(I know that totally sounds bad, but still). So, after four days with a bottle, he still had no problem latching on.
Nights/Days- He should figure it out pretty quick here, he is only two weeks old, in about a week or two he should start staying up longer but make sure you are waking him in the day as much as you can, not the night.
Binkies- I hate binkies, so my first two did not use them, my third did and I took it out of his mouth at one year and never gave it back. No harm done. But remember Binkies are easier to take away, not thumbs (I wouldn't encourage a thumb sucker).
Church- since it is summer, you should have no problems taking him to church now, just don't let the world hold him just yet. Mine were all born in fall and winter and I only waited two weeks with all and they were fine, I just never let anyone hold them or I brought sanitizer with me.
Boobs- since you have the Braby curse of enormous boobs, it sucks when it comes to breastfeeding. They are so big that yes, they will none stop produce milk. Just use pads and that should help. And in public, good luck, I always would just bring a bottle so I didn't have to feed in public. Good luck. Hope this helps. Reed is darling, I told your dad on Sunday that I've never seen a baby with Blond Hair and that he looks so dang cute. He was a very excited Grandpa.
Wow, Rhiannon. From these comments it seems like you have some light reading to do! :) Let's see...do you have nursing "undergarments"? I liked those because then my tummy was covered at least! Like Nicole, I didn't nurse in public, so I would give the kids a bottle. I am thinking that it was smart to introduce one to them because I know several people who never gave their kids a bottle and now they won't take one and they're pushing a year! I kind of started getting lazy with Claire (and loved the freedom) so I would give her formula more and more often and my milk dried up at like 3 1/2-4 months. I acted like I cared, but I was secretly so happy because I felt exhausted and I was getting really frustrated at constantly feeling "trapped." You'll get through it, but don't worry--no one holds it against you for being a zombie the first couple months!
Claire was super fussy, too. Until we found gas drops! You may want to try them. They are safe (I figure they have to be if the bottle says don't exceed 12 doses in one day--which is insane!) Right when we gave them to her, she was an angel.
I hope some of this helps, or lets you know you are not alone!
-I don't think you can get a routine before 6 weeks-it's really hard at first, but it seriously gets SOOOOO much better, but you do have to wait for about 6 weeks.
-As far as the pacifier goes, I'd say consider yourself lucky-Lucy would never take one and I was so jealous of other's Moms whose babies would.
-The day and night thing should figure itself out pretty quickly. Everyone would tell me to "sleep when the baby sleeps" which I hated b/c I felt like the moment she fell asleep I was banished to my room, but it sure was nice to get sleep. I usually did what I wanted to do and then slept if there was still time.
-I think the nursing thing takes about 3 weeks or so and then I felt like I could do it anywhere, but I was a human pacifier to Lucy so I had lots of practice.
-Some babies take formula from day 1 so I'd say do what you want with that. Lucy gets 1 supplemental bottle and I haven't ever noticed a difference with her as far as preference.
Gotta go, Lucy woke up
Oh Rhiannon, you have brought back the memories!! This is Robyn, Matt's wife by the way... First and foremost there is a thousand ways to raise a baby and it sounds like you are doing wonderful. I'll add my two bits but I know you are going to be fine!
Keep introducing the bottle just how you are. As long as Reed is established on the breast there shouldn't be a worry about using a bottle here and there.
Routine, Routine, Routine, that's all I can say to break the habit of getting his nights and days mixed up, but I do have to say that while he is so little he really should be eating on demand. He's used to getting 24 hour a day nourishment while he was in the womb. Be patient with him :)
Nursing gets easier; and I also promise you boobs will stop leaking as you regulate your own supply. I wore pads for weeks just because I worried so much. As for the breastfeeding in public, I just laugh at the memories; but I would practice whooping the boob out at home as if I were in public and try to be discreet. It's good practice. If you haven't gotten the nursing garments, go and get them they are very helpful and even a nursing bra. I never found one I liked so I just found one that clasped in the front.
If he likes the binkie then give it to him. It's his main source of comfort right now. You can wean him whenever you want; just because he uses a binkie at two weeks old doesn't mean he will want one at two years old.
Being a nurse I am a bit of a germafobe. I would keep him home for six weeks even though it's summer.
I feel really preachy, but overall I just want you to know that you can't do anything wrong. He's your baby and you know him best. By the way, I love his blond hair!!
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